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Today I was partied to a discussion regarding women and whether or not they dress for the admiration of men, the acceptance or envy of other women or themselves...the consensus was pretty much evenly distributed in most areas meaning that most women when asked picked one of these answers as their motivation to look good. I was deeply disturbed at the amount of women who said they dress solely based upon the opinions of others. This natural process has taught me that everyone is a critic, ourselves being the worst. It is easier and in my opinion healthier mentally to develop a close intimate relationship with oneself, IE learn your likes and dislikes...make yourself smile...see your own beauty, I mean really see your own beauty, treat yourself, spoil yourself, love on yourself, commit to changing the things you don't like about your self....it is only after these things have been done that we can truly enjoy and contribute unselfishly to a relationship with someone else.

You Sho Is Ugly

Well well well. In previous entries I have been critical about my brothas perception of good hair. Why? See on Friday I was told by an old friend who happens to be a black man to get a relaxer. Also the previous Sunday I was asked when I was gonna straighten it or "Do something else" with my mane. These are just a few examples of the straight up rude comments that have come from men, men I know specifically about the quality of my hair.

Well Saturday, I finally got a compliment from a brotha I didn't know. Well it wasn't like a compliment per say, maybe just a solicitation? As I waited outside my car for my take out order to finish, two young men walked past and said used juvenile methods to gain my attention. Although I didn't reciprocate interest, I took notice that it was the 1st time in a WHILE someone on the street tried to holla!

Although I am reading into something so random, and potentially and irrelevant, I can say that what is usually annoyance, was actually appreciated. I have had to not take my brothas comments to heart as it relates to my hair, because it honestly hurts to hear the way they percieve it. So to the 2 boys that was tryna get on, THANK YOU. You made me feel like all black men didn't find my hair repulsive, (even if that wasn't your intention.


First Lady